Amy, whatchu wanna do?
It is amusing and sad to me the time I can spend conjuring up worse possible scenarios in my head about something before it even happens. In the imagining process I can decide maybe to NOT do something, even if it is not being true to who God made me to be, for fear of rejection or whatever it may be.
On the last day of school each semester I give my professors a huge hug and tell them how much they mean to me. This class I just finished yesterday is taught by a woman who is definately an evolutionist (head of the bio dept.) and definately does not have a sense of humor. BUT I like her sooo much and I know it is the Lord putting her on my heart. I think she likes me, too. So I had made the decision as I was finishing my exam that I was not going to hug her. I turned in my exam and I thanked her and before I knew it I had grabbed her and was hugging her. The amazing this is that she made the hug a two-way connection almost immediately, as if she had been waiting for it. She did not let go for a good seven seconds and I had this thought that maybe she has not really been touched EVER.
Her demeanor had softened after the hug and I am so glad I just was myself because I would have really missed out. It really all boils down to just trusting God. If He made me like this why would I try to act unaccordingly? I guess it is like Paul where he does what he does not want to do and he does not do what he wants to do. We need Jesus. This is a Good thing.