To Whom Else Have We To Go?

I was reading in Samuel and discovered he was really in touch with God’s grieving heart for the people who were wading in sin and not even concerned in the least about it. Eli’s two sons were behaving very wickedly and Eli was soft with them. This is for sure still going on today.  Divorce is rampant in the church and so are secret affairs and kiddos doped up on smack.

God gave Samuel a vision that judgement was coming upon these “religious”, backslidden people. Samuel was afraid to tell Eli this vision, but he could not help but share it, which is wonderful. I love how Samuel was in tune with God’s heart to not put up with godliness without holiness. That man did grieve.

I have been thinking about this lately because the Lord keeps bringing up to my face that He is calling me to deep intercession and a hunger for righteousness. I have to be honest, I have been fighting this. I think it is because I get some altitude on the situation and I picture myself being really morose and grieved all the time and downcast in spirit and to me this seems depressing.

But what I am finding is that with this grief comes joy. Ironic?? In grieving over sin with the heart of God, He is going to honor you with His constant presence. Like with Habakkuk, “Though all else fails, my heart will rejoice in God alone.” David also really hungered for the Lord and he definately shared in God’s grief and knew it resulted in rejoicing.

I was also thinking about how the Son of Man came to be a servant, rather than to be served. He did not come as this mighty warrior with a metal breastplate and a gigantic sword. He was humble. So I do not feel like His heart is for us to be this mighty committee that is going to plow through the earth kicking butt and taking names. He wants humble children, because He is humble. Praying and fasting. Daily eating the body of Christ. YUM!!

God is just way too freaking cool. He is not satisfied with mediocre and He does not let His children settle for mediocrity. Lord, please help us to not turn our faces away when we see sin. Give us discerning spirits and make us humble. Give us a hunger that leads us to the prayer closet to share in your grief and to the body of Christ to share Your Joy.

The other day I was dropping off some decorations at this church called Glad Tidings and I noticed they had a prayer garden. As I was out there, I ended up finding this particular rock with this engraved into it:

“I looked for a man among them who would build up the wall and stand before me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not have to destroy it, but I found none.” Ezekiel 22:30

This has been haunting my spirit. I was thinking about how we are going to have the greatest Judgement come upon the earth. It’s all going to be justified in that moment. Revelation 6 talks about “the kings of the earth, the rich, the mighty, and every slave are going to run away to the mountains and scream, ‘Hide us from the face of him who sits on the throne and from the wrath of the Lamb!!’, for His great day of wrath has come. Who is able to stand?”

I know what kind of a person God is looking for. He is looking for someone who has iron in their spirit whom He can entrust with the treasures and the knowlege of God. Someone who is consumed with love for the Lord and stripped of all pride and worldly ambition. Wasits guarded and lamps a’burnin. This is a person who will be a shadetree for many and bring lots of people into safety in that hour. And they will stand in the gap for the nations.

We have got to get a sobriety in our spirits. Father, we do need You very desperately. We actually need you every millisecond. Would you train our arms for battle and expose drunkenness? Fill us with Your Reality, Jesus. Raise up your children and strengthen us in our innerman so that we could be able to stand for You.

 I have been hanging out in Jeremiah 20 for the past couple days.

“7 O Lord, you deceived me, and I was deceived; you overpowered me and prevailed. I am ridiculed all day long; everyone mocks me. 8 Whenever I speak, I cry out proclaiming violence and destruction. So the word of the Lord has brought me insult and reproach all day long. 9 But if I say, “I will not mention him or speak any more in his name,” his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.”

When Jeremiah is talking about the Lord deceiving him, I think he is talking about how when he committed to follow the Lord, he had no idea it was going to be like this - having to proclaim the wrath of God among His people in a time where false prophets were telling the people left and right that God will bring peace. But that part about the Word of God being a fire shut up in his bones…I feel you, brother Jeremiah. I love Jeremiah’s desperation to know and obey God and I have been praying for Jesus to “overpower” me and “prevail” in my heart as well.

On the way home from a ranch last night, I had to drive almost two hours out in the country and i knew there were lots of deer and such that often leap onto cars at night and suck the blood from-no, actually, they just jump on the cars, but I asked the Lord to protect me and He then told me, “I am going to show you I am protecting you”. Knowing this meant I was probably going to hit something yet knowing He keeps his promises, I proceeded to drive another 2 minutes before I hit someone’s family dog. Family dog, Lord??? Yeah, family dog. I slammed on my breaks super super had and ended up hitting the large, old dog. Had I swerved I would have hit oncoming traffic. The Lord takes care of me, for sure. Thanks be to God for His faithfulness!

I know the evil one is attacking people right now with discouragement. I know at least five different people right now who are about to go on mission trips overseas and the money is not coming in and their hearts are weary with discouragement. I can literally feel as the time gets closer for our Lord Jesus’ return, the enemy is trying to seize every opportunity he can get to keep God from being glorified in us.

A few days ago I was in the restroom and I kept hearing the word “demonolgy” and I was like, why is this horrible word in my head? Then I heard, “study your apponent”. I then realized the Lord wants me to study the tactics of the one who comes to kill, steal and destroy. I then remembered the verse that says, “For the battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the dark forces on this world.” That’s what the enemy is here to do, ya’ll. He has already lost the battle so he is left to wreak havoc on the earth.

When we are concerned and worried about things that the Lord has already taken care of, the last thing we think of doing is praying for the lost. I know for sure this is true with me.

But you guys, James 1:12 says, “Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.” Everything appears fine and normal here on earth, but if you look from heaven’s perspective, its a whole nother story. There is a battle going on. We have got to be guarded and ready for the day of the Lord.

I love Psalm 13:3; it reads, “Enlighten my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death.” It is the time to have our waists guarded and our lamps burning. Ephesians 6:11 says, “Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.”

Guys, daily examine and lay your souls bare before a Holy God. Cling to Him and pray even when you do not feel like it because Jesus is going to honor your heart and He knows your groanings.

Just to think, as in Revelation, there will be a “great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb.” His Name is going to be praised and every single knee is going to bow before King Jesus Christ!!!! Yipee Skippee!! 

There are several prayers for the world today in the ten-day prayer guide for the Global Day of Prayer. If you aren’t aware of this, every nation in the world together prays specific prayers concerning the Glory of God bursting through specifically for ten days leading up to Pentecost Sunday. Then tonight, in stadiums all over the world, thousands of people are praying together and praising God and asking for Christ to be revealed among the nations!! People in Africa are joining together right now, as it is morning here in America..I just LOVE that we are all asking for this together, we are partenering with Jesus and spreading the Good News of our Savior Christ.

The first few prayer acknowlege the AWESOMENESS and HOLINESS of our God, the next few confess our brokenness and our desperate need for a savior even though we are already saved. And then…

“Lord Jesus Christ, because You were dead, but are now risen; and because the Father has given You a Name above all names, You will defeat all powers of evil.

You have declared that the gates of hell will not prevail against Your Church. We pray for deliverance from demonic oppression. We pray for the tearing down of the strongholds and ideologies that hinder and resist the spreading of the knowledge of God.

We resist the plan of the enemy to keep nations in darkness and pray that You will remove the veil that covers the peoples. We ask for open doors so that the gospel can enter every nation. Restrain the evil that promotes violence and death.

Break the hold of slavery, tyranny and disease. Fill us with courage to preach Your Word fearlessly and faithfully. Give us a spirit of intercession to cry out on behalf of the lost.”

I had the opportunity to jog this morning with a Korean woman who lives in my neighborhood. She follows Jesus and I like her for many reasons, but just one is that when we sing praise songs together at my house, she always wants to sing these old hymns that I have never heard before in my life. She gets them from hymnal.net and the website provides the piano and words for us while we sing.

Her dad is visiting from Korea and was showing me his amazing vegetable garden in their yard. This man is so zealous. I was very excited with him because my mom and I are planting vegetables in our yard. We asked the Lord to grow his tomatoes that were growing at a very disheartening rate. But what amazed me literally is that he went and grabbed his best first cucumber of the season and his best 14 chinese green beans of the season and dumped them in my arms. He didn’t even hesitate one second. He just handed them over joyfully, not worried about the cost. It reminded me of Mary of Bethany how she poured the oil on Jesus extravagantly. Lord, I do not just want to be obedient. That cannot be the extent, I want to be extravagant in my love for you. I want to pass to you the firstfruits you so graciously provide me with as this man did.

The Lord has been teaching me alot about stuardship lately and that is why this story is so appropriate.

It isn’t my money or even my time. Or even when I feel tired of extending a listening ear…it is not about me at all. Good-night. I am SO glad it is not about me! Thank you, Father.

This is the cake I made for the children in my Sunday school class. Whomever the precious man I marry will be will probably not be doing it for the cooking skills.

I have been listening to a Mike Bickle teaching called “Mary of Bethany” found on the Ihop.org site. I have listened to this probably once a week for the past month and I weep every time I listen to it.

“He that believeth on me need not perish”. The is a present-tense action- believing on Jesus. I love that He says believeth on rather than in. Bickle talks about how many people are saved, yet are parishing. If we are not totally devoted to Jesus, if we are not set apart from the normal “christianity of America”, then we are parishing. We are either wasting our life on Jesus or wasting it to the evil one. This so convicts my heart.

In this teaching Bickle reads through the scripture about Mary of Bethany pouring the $20, 000 worth of perfume on Jesus and anointing Him before His death. I love this story, and I love Mary’s heart. She extravagantly wasted everything she had on Jesus in that moment. She did not care what the people around her thought about her because she saw everything in her life in light of Him. Mary was desperate to give everything she had to Jesus. She couldn’t not give Him everything. She understood the one true thing that is of importance and she understood Christ’s value. I want to have this kind of heart, not just because I am very tired of it being about me, but more than that because the least I could do is give my life to Him. Lord, You deserve that and so much more. I am so sorry, Lord, for making it all about myself. I am sorry for not believing on you and for allowing fear to take over places in my heart. But I thank you that You are a God who is slow to anger and abounding in Love. Thank you that I do not have to dress up to come before your throne, but that your desire is a broken, contrite heart. Thank you that you are the Good Sherpherd and You continue to pursue me with Your love. Thank you that You do not give permission to anything or anyone else to satisfy us. Only You can satisfy. As frustrating as it makes me sometimes, I am SO thankful.  

I have been thinking alot about Jewish people lately and have been having different conversations with different people and running across different scriptures dealing with our relationship to the Jews and Jesus’ relationship to the Jews.

I read through Romans 11 with two friends this morning. My attitude towards Jewish people since I came to know the Lord has not been one of mercy but one of “you are wrong”. But there is something VERY significant and important about Jewish people that I feel like I am just barely barely starting to grasp. Jewish people all throughout the old and new testament have been used as “vehicles” for the Word of God. Jesus Himself was a Jew and He came to save the Jews. But of course they rejected Him, so our salvation as gentiles is a product of that rejection. The Lord warns us as Gentiles in this passage three different times not to be arrogant towards the Jews…”You will then say, ‘Branches were broken off so that I could be grafted in.’ Granted. But they were broken off because of unbelief, and you stand by faith” (Romans 11:19-20).

Romans 11:11 reads:
“But by their transgression salvation has come to the Gentiles, to make them jealous. Now if their transgression is riches for the world and their failure is riches for the Gentiles, how much more will their fulfillment be!”

That part about making the Jews jealous. Felipe pointed out this morning that the jealousy that is intended to turn them back to Jesus is not present now. The Jewish people have taken the place of the Gentiles and its like the Gentiles have taken place of the Jews in terms of respect. But they are not jealous that we claim Yahweh, that we claim Jesus, our God as Yahweh, which is their God.

Romans 11 also says that “Israel has experienced a hardening in part until the full number of the Gentiles has come in. And so all Israel will be saved.” The Jewish people in the endtimes before Jesus returns are going to turn their eyes to Jesus. So the enemy is going to fight and attack like crazy to keep this from happening because he does not want the prophesy of God to be fulfilled. He will not win, but he is still fighting. So it would make sense that we should not only love and protect the Jews because Jesus loves them, but to pray for their salvation. I do want to understand this more, because I have to know you more, Jesus. I need to know your Love and your Kingliness and Your Character.

I just feel very strongly in my spirit that there is SO much more to Jewish people than them just being wrong. I am asking the Lord for more revelation. In the endtimes (which are rapidly approaching), the Christians will be separated out. During the time of the antichrist there will be separated out those who are going to stand as mighty warriors hot for Christ and those who are going to claim that “this gospel is too hard for me”. So we need to have our waists guarded and our lamps burning. The last thing Jesus told His disciples was to go and make disciples of the nations. We are either going to be a part of this or we are not. If we do not obey He will find someone else who will.

The prophesies of the Holy Word are being fulfilled right now as I am sitting here breathing and eating a popsickle. Come, Lord, because if you don’t come, I don’t have. If you don’t give, I am nothing.

Ok Hebrews 2 has been blowing my freakin mind today.

“Both the One who makes men holy and those who are made holy are of the same family…Jesus says, ‘Here I am, and the children God has given me’. Since the children have flesh and blood, He too shared in their humanity so that by His death He might destroy Him who holds the power of death - that is, the devil - and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.”  I just cannot get over that. Jesus came and made Himself below a servant. For even the Son of man did not come to be served, but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. And they were expecting this towering king who overloards over people. I love that about Him. It then goes on to read:”

“For this reason He had to be made like His brothers in every way, in order that He might become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that He might make atonement for the sins of people.” He can relate to us because He suffered. Our big brother Jesus went before us and suffered, but without sin.

Real quick, something else I have been thinking about the Jews being the chosen people of God. So we are called Abraham’s decendents and when Jesus came it’s not like He shoved the Jews out of the way, but more like His family was extended, and we have a choice whether to be in it. If we had been around way before Jesus came to earth, we would not have had the choice to be a Jew- we could have very well been born Gentiles. The promises of God such as in Isaiah were originally made to the Jews. BUT, they are now extended to those of us who are in Christ’s family. BUT, they were originally written for the Jews which I feel is important to acknowledge because then Christ gets the glory. He is glorified when I think about how these promises are now mine. Without Him, there would be no salvation or atonement for sins and definately no Holy Spirit.

To whom else have we to go, Jesus? You have the words of eternal life. The times when we most feel like the Lord is distant or that He is a detached, stoic being, these are the times He calls us to press deeper into Him rather than stepping back and embracing futility. It is so difficult for me when experiencing this to posture my heart towards Him. Like my middle name implies, I am a cold, dark rock on my own, but when the light of the Son reflects off of it then it is brilliant, radiant, and Christ-like.

Today was the final day of my internship at the nursing home in Pflugerville. It was only for three days, but I am definately different. It felt like a shock going in- overstimulation. I had not prepared spiritually for it (not that I would have to work up my “spiritualness”, but I just mean I was not humbled and willing to be used). Sooo first and second day were incredibly difficult. Today was different story. After talking to big brother Ryan and reading Hebrews 4, I went in this morning with a different mindset. I had the opportunity to minister to a resident and read my favorite part of Luke 9 with him about where Jesus tells the disciples to take up their cross daily and follow him. This man responded - it was excellent.

This experience of the nursing home has been so difficult but wonderful. Wonderful in that the Lord is shattering that box I put Him in. Thank you, Lord, that you do that every time I think I have it all figured out. I cannot make it one single moment without you. I will now be able to apply for the Children’s hospital here in a few monthes. I cannot wait. I drive by it in the mornings on the way to AustinHOP and I get very good butterflies in my stomach.

Dear brother, I want you to know as you are reading this that you to me are like a precious, small, albino pony dashing across the open plains of the African savannas. Run, little pony…for where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. Thanks for helping me get this page up.